CONTINUATION OF PART 2
A COUPLE OF WEEKS LATER, I RECEIVED AN OFFICIAL LETTER FROM THE UNITED STATES CONGRESS DELIVERED BY SPECIAL SERVICES. I OPENED THE LETTER AND TOOK OUT A PIECE OF PAPER WITH SOME UNIQUE TOUCH AND TEXTURE ON IT. IT LOOKED VERY IMPORTANT, VERY EXCEPTIONAL. IT WAS A LETTER REGARDING THE MEDAL OF HONOR PRESENTED BY THE MILITARY CHAIN OF COMMAND. THE DATE AND TIME WAS INFORMED ON THE PAPER AS WELL AS THE PROCEDURES AND OTHER RELATED INFORMATION. I DIDN'T ACTUALLY WANTED TO ATTEND THE CEREMONY SINCE I DON'T DESERVE THE HONOR, I'M NOT QUALIFIED TO GET SUCH A GREAT APPRECIATION. BUT SOMETHING IN ME TOLD ME THAT I SHOULD, THAT I SHOULD JUST GO OUT ONCE AGAIN TO THE OUTSIDE WORLD RATHER THAN LOCKING MYSELF UP IN THE HOUSE SINCE THE WAR. IT HAS BEEN ALMOST THREE WEEKS SINCE I'VE SEEN THE OUTSIDE WORLD.
IT WAS JUNE THE 20TH, AND I COULDN'T SLEEP THE WHOLE NIGHT. THE NEXT DAY WAS MY CEREMONY, THE DAY I RECEIVE THE MEDAL. I JUST CLOSED MY EYES AND RESTED NOT BEING ABLE TO SLEEP. THE NEXT MORNING, I WOKE UP REALIZING THAT I ACTUALLY SLEPT OFF FEELING NERVOUS AND ANXIOUS AND SCARED. I GOT READY FOR THE CEREMONY, WORE MY CEREMONIAL OUTFIT AND STEPPED OUT OF THE HOUSE FOR THE FIRST TIME AFTER SO LONG. THE BRIGHT SUN ALMOST BLINDED MY EYES WHICH REMINDED ME OF THE SAME TRAUMATIZING EXPERIENCE AT VIETNAM. I STARTED SWEATING LIKE A PIG AT THAT MOMENT. MY GENERAL CAME TO PICK ME UP AND ASKED IF I'M OKAY AND ALL I SAID WAS I'M FINE.WE REACHED THE WHITE HOUSE WITHIN 20 MINUTES WITH ALL THE ESCORTS AT THE FRONT AND THE BACK OF MY CAR AS IF THEY WERE GUARDING THE PRESIDENT HIMSELF.I WAS PROMOTED TO LIEUTENANT GENERAL AFTER THE TRAGEDY. MAYBE THAT'S WHY I'M BEING ESCORTED. IT FELT GOOD FOR A MOMENT TILL I REALIZED AGAIN THAT I DON'T ACTUALLY DESERVE IT.
EVERYONE SALUTED AS I ENTERED THE WHITE HOUSE WITH MAJOR GENERAL BESIDE ME. IT WAS CONSIDERED AN HONOR TO EVEN STAND BESIDE MAJOR GENERAL. I HEADED TOWARDS THE CEREMONY AND TOOK MY SEAT AT THE FRONT ROW.THE WHOLE PLACE WAS DECORATED AS IF IT WAS A WEDDING. THE LAST I SAW ALL THESE WAS WHEN MY DAD RECEIVED A MEDAL OF HONOR THRICE. NO W IT WAS MY TURN, BUT THE ONLY DIFFERENCE WAS THAT MY DAD ACTUALLY IS WORTHY FOR THE MEDAL AND I'LL NEVER BE QUALIFIED FOR IT. THEY CALLED MY NAME OUT, AND I PANICKED AGAIN AND STARTED BATHING IN SWEAT. EVERYONE STARTED CLAPPING AND THE ATMOSPHERE WAS FILLED WITH THIS POSITIVE, HAPPY VIBES. I SAW ALL THESE HAPPY FACES AROUND ME REALIZING THAT THIS WAS MEANT FOR SOMEONE ELSE, FOR THOMAS. TEARS STARTED ROLLING DOWN MY CHEEKS AS I REACHED OUT MY HAND SO SHAKE WITH THE PRESIDENT. EVERYONE WERE SMILING WITH JOY AND PRIDE WHILE I WAS SAD AND DISAPPOINTED AS THE PRESIDENT BESTOWED THE MEDAL UPON ME.
HERE I A'M NOW STARING AT THE VERY SAME PHOTOGRAPH TAKEN ON THAT DAY AS A RETIRED MILITARY OFFICER. FEELING THE VERY SAME USELESSNESS DEEP WITHIN WITHIN ME. LET THESE MEMORIES AND INCIDENTS BE BURIED WITH ME WHEN I DIE.
https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBF_enMY827MY827&biw=1920&bih=920&tbm=isch&sxsrf=ACYBGNQ-O-pTLDPTk99GECa-XiVO8DZWJA%3A1571277678198&sa=1&ei=bsunXaLdC7WGmgetvqPgCw&q=MAJOR+GENERAL+OF+UNITED+STATES+AND+LIEUTENANT+GENERAL&oq=MAJOR+GENERAL+OF+UNITED+STATES+AND+LIEUTENANT+GENERAL&gs_l=img.3...97310.111199..112174...0.0..0.152.2752.52j1......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......35i39j0i67j0j0i8i30j0i24.JKNC0GhH2Fs&ved=0ahUKEwiizOi-maLlAhU1g-YKHS3fCLwQ4dUDCAc&uact=5
A COUPLE OF WEEKS LATER, I RECEIVED AN OFFICIAL LETTER FROM THE UNITED STATES CONGRESS DELIVERED BY SPECIAL SERVICES. I OPENED THE LETTER AND TOOK OUT A PIECE OF PAPER WITH SOME UNIQUE TOUCH AND TEXTURE ON IT. IT LOOKED VERY IMPORTANT, VERY EXCEPTIONAL. IT WAS A LETTER REGARDING THE MEDAL OF HONOR PRESENTED BY THE MILITARY CHAIN OF COMMAND. THE DATE AND TIME WAS INFORMED ON THE PAPER AS WELL AS THE PROCEDURES AND OTHER RELATED INFORMATION. I DIDN'T ACTUALLY WANTED TO ATTEND THE CEREMONY SINCE I DON'T DESERVE THE HONOR, I'M NOT QUALIFIED TO GET SUCH A GREAT APPRECIATION. BUT SOMETHING IN ME TOLD ME THAT I SHOULD, THAT I SHOULD JUST GO OUT ONCE AGAIN TO THE OUTSIDE WORLD RATHER THAN LOCKING MYSELF UP IN THE HOUSE SINCE THE WAR. IT HAS BEEN ALMOST THREE WEEKS SINCE I'VE SEEN THE OUTSIDE WORLD.
IT WAS JUNE THE 20TH, AND I COULDN'T SLEEP THE WHOLE NIGHT. THE NEXT DAY WAS MY CEREMONY, THE DAY I RECEIVE THE MEDAL. I JUST CLOSED MY EYES AND RESTED NOT BEING ABLE TO SLEEP. THE NEXT MORNING, I WOKE UP REALIZING THAT I ACTUALLY SLEPT OFF FEELING NERVOUS AND ANXIOUS AND SCARED. I GOT READY FOR THE CEREMONY, WORE MY CEREMONIAL OUTFIT AND STEPPED OUT OF THE HOUSE FOR THE FIRST TIME AFTER SO LONG. THE BRIGHT SUN ALMOST BLINDED MY EYES WHICH REMINDED ME OF THE SAME TRAUMATIZING EXPERIENCE AT VIETNAM. I STARTED SWEATING LIKE A PIG AT THAT MOMENT. MY GENERAL CAME TO PICK ME UP AND ASKED IF I'M OKAY AND ALL I SAID WAS I'M FINE.WE REACHED THE WHITE HOUSE WITHIN 20 MINUTES WITH ALL THE ESCORTS AT THE FRONT AND THE BACK OF MY CAR AS IF THEY WERE GUARDING THE PRESIDENT HIMSELF.I WAS PROMOTED TO LIEUTENANT GENERAL AFTER THE TRAGEDY. MAYBE THAT'S WHY I'M BEING ESCORTED. IT FELT GOOD FOR A MOMENT TILL I REALIZED AGAIN THAT I DON'T ACTUALLY DESERVE IT.
EVERYONE SALUTED AS I ENTERED THE WHITE HOUSE WITH MAJOR GENERAL BESIDE ME. IT WAS CONSIDERED AN HONOR TO EVEN STAND BESIDE MAJOR GENERAL. I HEADED TOWARDS THE CEREMONY AND TOOK MY SEAT AT THE FRONT ROW.THE WHOLE PLACE WAS DECORATED AS IF IT WAS A WEDDING. THE LAST I SAW ALL THESE WAS WHEN MY DAD RECEIVED A MEDAL OF HONOR THRICE. NO W IT WAS MY TURN, BUT THE ONLY DIFFERENCE WAS THAT MY DAD ACTUALLY IS WORTHY FOR THE MEDAL AND I'LL NEVER BE QUALIFIED FOR IT. THEY CALLED MY NAME OUT, AND I PANICKED AGAIN AND STARTED BATHING IN SWEAT. EVERYONE STARTED CLAPPING AND THE ATMOSPHERE WAS FILLED WITH THIS POSITIVE, HAPPY VIBES. I SAW ALL THESE HAPPY FACES AROUND ME REALIZING THAT THIS WAS MEANT FOR SOMEONE ELSE, FOR THOMAS. TEARS STARTED ROLLING DOWN MY CHEEKS AS I REACHED OUT MY HAND SO SHAKE WITH THE PRESIDENT. EVERYONE WERE SMILING WITH JOY AND PRIDE WHILE I WAS SAD AND DISAPPOINTED AS THE PRESIDENT BESTOWED THE MEDAL UPON ME.
HERE I A'M NOW STARING AT THE VERY SAME PHOTOGRAPH TAKEN ON THAT DAY AS A RETIRED MILITARY OFFICER. FEELING THE VERY SAME USELESSNESS DEEP WITHIN WITHIN ME. LET THESE MEMORIES AND INCIDENTS BE BURIED WITH ME WHEN I DIE.
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